I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
Randomize
