can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
She's "threw gas on the fire to put it out" drunk. Come retrieve ur gf. Ps she smells like burnt hair
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
So basically, I've just woken up in another random bed and I go to get my pants and he's wearing them. Like my underwear is in them... What the fuck is wrong with my life?
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
Randomize
