at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
Randomize
