When are you freeeeeeeeee?
My phone auto corrected that to freeeeeeeeeedoooooooooom. That's kinda awesome.
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
Randomize
