Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
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You made out with my dog and told me he tasted like a rainbow.
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
in mid sex he pointed out my great gatsby tattoo and we started discussing themes and metaphors from our fave fitzgerald novels
you need to stop fucking English majors
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
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