My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
So I tried to call my phone from his phone and was like, "hey, my name is not in here..I thought you had my number" turns out he has my number saved as "gives good head"
I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
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