I heard we made out
Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
These 25 People Forgave their Significant Others for Saying Stupid Things
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
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