What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
Just heard my neighbor say "I'm just gonna lay down in a coma until someone comes into my room and hands me a beer." He's got his priorities straight
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
Randomize
