the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
my family just sang happy birthday to baby jesus. no ones even drunk yet
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
Breakfast sounds amazing but can we do IHOP instead? I have to pick up a Plan B pill and there’s a CVS next to it
Randomize
