these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
Bridesmaid dress fitting. I look like a Weeble and Michelle looks like Malibu Barbie. I have to keep reminding myself that she has herpes so really, the playing field is more level than it might initially seem.
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
I hate it when fuck holes buy me drinks at the bar. You don't know my order. You don't know me. You don't know where I've been. You don't know my life.
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
Randomize
