she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
you were so high you spent the rest of the night smelling pepper to prove you can sneeze with your eyes open
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
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