Flowers- 20. Dinner-50. Drinks- 25. Hotel- 150. The look on his face when I tell him I'm on my period? Priceless.
the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
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