What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
i woke up this morning in my bathroom,naked, with my boxers around my face and puke and shit on the floor and wondering why i didn't have a toenail on my one big toe.
compared to you, a hobo is quite responsible.
woke up this morning with "hah" written on my penis.i was like wtf?? morning wood kicked in and found out what it really said, haNNah.then i remembered.
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
Randomize
