I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
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I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Where was Alyssa when you were sniffing the bouncer?
Passed out on some guy who looked like someone from Duck Dynasty.
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
I like being woken up by phone calls of you sabotaging marriages
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
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