Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
I just want to make him a cookie cake that says "you have no chance with me."
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
Randomize
