I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
When I came home you were watching infomercials, eating croutons out of the box and salsa from a funnel. Well done.
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
ttyl tear gas
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
Randomize