Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
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