She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
I need a horse. I don't think you can get a DUI on a living creature.
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
so the x-ray technician didnt buy my story of falling off a curb. she said a fall of that height couldnt snap the bone that way. bitch called me a drunken idiot too. if she wasnt so hot i'd be angry
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
earned some solid air miles from the plan B I just bought. #silverlinings
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
Randomize