worst night to have a conscience
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
DON'T BE A PUSSY. ONLY 1/3 OF THE WORDS IN YOUR LAST TEXT WERE MISSPELLED, WHICH MEANS YOU NEED 2/3 MORE SHOTS.
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
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