no. you can't hotbox the world.
Too bad my thesis topic isn't "defining a hot mess: a study in drinking, smoking and other bad life decisions."
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
My mom just found some of our lube mixed in with my box of pots and pans. I hate moving home.
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
I think my mom knows im high. It could be because im slow dancing with my cat in the kitchen. The dip and kiss is what gave it away.
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
You can't just leave with hair like that
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
Randomize