Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
I am midnight drunk by noon
I'm wayyy too drunk to be in a parade right now
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
Randomize
