and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
Randomize
