yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
I just made my bed perfectly before realizing that I'll be too drunk to appreciate it tonight
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
Randomize
