well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
He picked me up went to throw me on his bed. I landed on the wood frame. That's how I broke my rib. We still fucked. Thanks tequila. Best injury ever
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
He put oyster crackers in his ramen noodles. Is that a thing? Because holy shit I had never thought of it before and if it's not a thing he's my new stoner hero for discovering it.
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
Randomize
