let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
A stripper just invited me to her daughter's birthday. Where did my life go wrong?
The last thing I searched on my phone was "leave in conditioner on cats." This is where my life is.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
If I make it through this whole bridesmaid process without anyone knowing that I actually hate everyone but the bride, including the groom, I deserve a complimentary bottle of vodka.
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
Randomize
