I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
There're making snowcones with the leftover vodka from last night. This is not the time to be making up excuses!
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
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