Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
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morning after pill = breakfast in bed
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
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sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
I met her parents last night. Her dad smelled like weed and kept yelling "I HAVE ALLERGIES AHHH MY EYES ARE BURNING!" During dinner It had to be good weed he didn't even know he was yelling.
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
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