wat bout pragnant strippers??
dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
My financial advisor filed my girlfriend's abortion under "investments" so my wife wouldn't find out
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize
