I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
For a second I thought I had fallen asleep on the floor and freaked out. Then I thought somehow I was on drugs. This is my life.
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
Umm my dog ate your vibrator. Sorry 😬
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
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