youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
Must've forgot to hang up with her when I was telling Josh I plan to pop champagne if I nail her tonight. She showed up with a bottle and said "only if we can toast it with Josh"
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
Randomize
