I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
She left me with blue balls so I jerked off on her french toast in the morning.
So im at the gym and some guy has a tattoo of a hand doing the shocker... The douche bag bar has been raised yet again.
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
I just need you to stay far enough away that I can't smell your cologne. I completely forget that I fucking hate you as soon as I smell it.
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
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