READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
Considering we're about to fuck, I really need your girlfriend to stop liking all my Facebook posts.
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
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