dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
I actually had to tell him that sex doesn't replace my Tupperware. Our relationship has reached a weird level.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
It went from a "chill game of beer pong" to "absinthe body shots and a tits parade" in literally two minutes.
Told you inviting her was a good idea.
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Randomize