omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
Im really high right now and the vending machine is broken and giving out free candy. Please kill me, my life will never get better than this
cat food counts as protein by the way
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
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