Screwed.edu
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
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