____ banged a stripper...well technically she's now a hooker...
Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
don't bother texting me at 10. my pants WILL be off and I'm not putting them back on to come see you.
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
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