In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
Someone said we're out of ice. You collapsed on the spot and started sobbing, saying 'but where will all the polar bears live". That drunk.
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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