just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
My mom just got knocked over by a rollerblader. I'm trying not to laugh, bc my family looks pretty concerned
I'm okay, they said the swelling should go down in a week. But next time I'm shitwrecked, please make sure to remind me that I can't open a champagne bottle with corkscrew.
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
I don't care if we're married you can't just walk into the bedroom with a pizza box expecting to get laid
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
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