My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
I'm good, just tired from chardonnay and giving hand jobs.
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
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