whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
The waiter to-go cupped my bloody mary without me even asking. THAT hungover.
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
Randomize
