The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
"Wait, who's gun did I have?" Moments when you re-examine your life choices.
They flooded the bathroom and their version of cleaning it up was to throw our couch cushions on it. That's when I decided to chug tequila and go drunk bowling. So hitting the kid with my ball is really their fault.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
When you're a bigshot ER surgeon and I'm a starving artist, I want you to remember who held your hair last night.
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
It's a combination of amazing uncoordination, bad luck, and sheer determination to cause destruction wherever I go.
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
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