Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
Randomize
