Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
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Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
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