I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
lets start a swedish sibling band together
i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
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