Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
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