puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
Randomize
