at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Randomize
