Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
the cab driver asked if you were our mom. you definitely shouldn't have tipped him so much.
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
Randomize
