If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
new years resolution: more sex, less car punching, more chipotle.
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
Honestly I was sitting in managerial accounting thinking "I really need to get my shit together and stop drinking so much wine." But when you asked I realized... it's wine. It's always a yes.
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
I told two kids in their homecoming outfits to use a condom because of Ebola. I may have saved a life last night
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
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