I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
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