whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
Right. Will do. I'll call you if I need a ride. (that is a double meaning, go with it.)
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
Randomize