so that wasnt chicken after all
WOAH SHIT! That wasn't my girlfriend last night.
I woke up at 7am naked in my bathtub with the shower running. My apartment was so full of steam that my ceiling was dripping. Who thought it would be okay for me to get my own place, anyway?
I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
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Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
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