I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
I just watched my mom open a wine bottle with an electric drill. I have never been so proud.
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
I’ve had a lot of vodka, 3 different dicks and no food since last night. Come get me
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